I've been back at work for a week now and it hasn't been easy. I'm super tired and my brain just doesn't function quite as quickly as it used to. I'm trying my best to keep up with everything, but it all feels a little harder than it did before and I struggle just a little more than I think I should. Its extremely frustrating.
I went to a support group for young women with breast cancer last night, but it didn't really help me all that much. I went expecting to meet someone about my age in the same point in treatment as me, but instead I met with a group of very nice and strong women who are on the other side of chemo and surgery and are probably in their 30's. It helped a little to see that there is life beyond chemo, but it didn't help to hear about the issues they were still dealing with. It deflated me a little and made everything a bit more frustrating.
In other news, I think my head is starting to feel tingly, so I think tomorrow might be the day that I finally lose my hair. I thought I had come to terms with it, but now the more that I think about it, the more emotional I become. It wouldn't be such a big deal if I were a man, but there's just something about a bald woman that makes heads turns. Once I lose my hair, I am officially a wig-wearing, scarf-tying cancer patient -- I've been able to pretend I wasn't up until now.
Bottom line, I'm doing okay, but its been a long and frustrating week. Here's hoping things turn around soon, so I can get back to my positive attitude.
Erin
You are doing an AMAZING job of coping with all that has been thrown at you ! You should feel very proud of yourself....I know that I'm very proud of how you have handled everything. These are just a few hurdles that you have to get over on the way to having this all behind you. You are doing GREAT Lola!
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